Steven Seagal Lawman: And Why The WWF Should Be More Powerful

Nothing gets Steven Seagal excited like mix and matching human appendages into strange positions. Take this poor fellow above, looks like he's a victim of Steven making a modern art piece of human arms. And don't want to share the rest of the images, but let's just say I've seen Steven Seagal do some  things with fingers, toes, and kneecaps, that you can't possibly fathom. But all arm twisting aside, are people aware that Steven has a new TV show where he is a cop? Let me clarify, he is not playing a cop, no, he really is a cop, apparently he's been one for 20 years.

That being said, if the reviews of the show are to be believed, apparently Steven is not snapping fingers like chicken bones or ripping out throats (wait, that was Swayze) on the show. Which brings me to the question of the decade? Why the hell is Steven Seagal not snapping fingers like chicken bones and ripping out throats on his TV SHOW?

The reason? I'll tell you the reason.  When it comes to "reality" TV shows like this, the wrong people are calling the shots. The person who needs to be calling the shots is none other than Vince McMahon, the mastermind of the WWE. This is a dude who virtually invented "reality" television, so therefore I'm sure he could make Mr. Seagal's show a hell of lot cooler. And what is cooler? Check out this classic Seagal scene below.

And by the way, if I seem a little crazy today, it's because I still have not recovered from the mind melt of the Iron Man 2 poster.

Not ready for the Seagal Plunge Yet.

A couple of weeks ago I posted about how I wanted to get into Steven Seagal movies. It is with great sadness that I report back to you and say that certain things (new president, Jack Bauer, and Lost) got in the way and delayed my quest to understand the zen art of being Seagal. However yesterday, perhaps in an omen, this little video was sent to me. I have to say it has re-kindled the fire that burns in my action movie loving soul to understand this last great action star from the 80's.

Taking The Steven Seagal Plunge

I woke up today I realized that I have not seen more than two Steven Seagal movies. I've seen "Under Siege" and one of the many movies he did with DMX, but after that, nothing. And you know what, this bothers me.

Granted, Seagal has a reality TV show, sings blue music, and sells energy drinks, he still was an action icon of badassery on par with Stallone, Van Damme, and Ahnuld.

So I've decided to bump all those Seagal movies to the top of the netflix que, and get serious about this forgotten action star. Yeah, I will say he is forgotten because this dude hasn't a big screen flick in years. For a man that once took out a bunch of evil Spanish dudes with a machete, he's gotta get back on that silver screen.

So, I guess I'm taking the plunge into a world of Seagal. I'll report back with my findings, hopefully they will make me forget those flicks with the X Man.

Update: Check out the trailer for his new flick: