August 25, 2011

The 10 Positions Steve Jobs Could Be Moving Onto


Let me be clear, I love Apple. The iphone, ibook, ipad, and appletv (dayum when did I end up with all of those) are great and make my life easier and better. So while it's "sad" that Steve Jobs is no longer the bossman, here are ten jobs that he could potentially fill.

1. See above, clearly the top of the Jedi Council. I'm talking the Yoda positon, even though with his long ass turtle ass neck and bald dome he does kind of loook like Ki-Adi-Mundi. If you're not like Perlin or Rizzla and don't have ample ammount of Star Wars knowledge, check out this link.

2. Considering the Earthquake in the northeast is just a recent sign of the coming apocalypse, one must hope that Jobs left Apple to focus on saving us from whatever is coming in 2012 (unless of course Apple will become Skynet in 2012, then we are all screwed)

3. Joining the Avengers or The Justice League or joining one and then buying the other one to destroy the competition

4. High ranking tech/leadership position on the Council of Elrond.

5. He could run for President, that's all I'm saying.

6. Considering this photo from extremely *trustworthy* site Kiwileaks this photo shows that Jobs has been reverse engineering alien technology for years.  Now that the Ipad 2 is out and snow crash is imminent, he needs more tech so is becoming Luke/The Last Starfighter/Ender/Sheppard to travel the galaxy looking for alien tech.

7. Something to do with Transformers but I can't come up with a good story, all I can think about is 3D explosions and fighting.

8. Finally going back into Tron to rescue The Dude/Flynn and also go play secret DJ sets with Daft Punk at the End of the Line club

9. He's teaming up with Caesar the ape...no?

10. God (shitttt brahhhhhhhhh)

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