Why Fan Boys Hating On Twilight Is Unfounded

SWEAR TO ME MY FANS ARE MORE CRAZY!

I think they know it. I mean they gotta know right? These "Twilight " films are total pieces of garbage. And I'll risk my action movie cred and say I've seen both of em, and they still suck. While many people can report back on why the franchise is so appealing, I don't think the maniacs camped out in CAMP TWILIGHT care about reasons or motivations. They like their vampires and werewolves (and abs). Yet, in the midst of the of all this fan hoopla, the Twilight fans have one major nemesis: the fanboys.

Last year people started to complain how the the Twilight fans ruined Comic-Con, the mecca of everything fanboys stand for (this year it might be something else that joyously ruins the party). The vampire lovers took the good seats in Hall H!, They ruined the Avatar panel! The sonic force of their screams for Taylor Lautner damaged the foundations of the convention hall and endangered everyone!

The perfect example of this hatred was in May at the Iron Man 2 midnight show - Favreau and Downey Jr showed up and fired the crowd up into a frenzy. When the Eclipse trailer hit, people were losing their shit, booing, flipping off the screen, throwing junior mints and everything else in their laps (not Iphones, they were too busy tweeting). And for what reason? We're the same people! Oh, yeah, I guess I'm a fanboy, I wrote a poem about Iron Man for gods sake.

"Twihards" love their Edward Cullen and fanboys love their Tony Stark. The fanboys obsess over the perfect director for their geek opus, The Avengers, while Twihards get directors fired if they don't like them. Castings and recasting are huge deal for all parties. Comic-Con is mutual heaven. Lines for midnight shows are a must. Everyone is in the same boat, eating the same products, drinking the same Kool-Aid, just the color and the taste is different. And at the end of the day, we're all paying the same ticket prices and waiting in the same line.

24 Points About 24: 2:00 PM - 4:00 PM

 TRUTH

1. First point, here we go, Kiefer such a classy guy. Thanks for thanking us for watching, even if only the even numbered seasons were good. Wait, actually this season is awesome, and it's an even numbered season, so the curse is broken.
2. Michael Madsen has so many damn servers, you'd think he was running the entire network for limewire, bearshare, and kazaa.
3. Jack saved Madsen's life in Damascus. What was Jack doing in Damascus? You know it's ending, and I can't ever do this again, so I hope that Jack was killing vampires and demons in Damascus.

4. If there is one thing FPJ hates, it's the when the press get's abused. You see FPJ has a degree in journalism from Syracuse and also a law degree in First Ammendment litigation from the halls of Harvard or as he says Hevid.
5. I said it last week, Charles Logan is such a rookie. He's still having conversations on cell phones in the accident scene within earshot of everyone. Get your game up Charlie Boy.
6. Charles Logan doesn't know how to quit Jason Pillar or it's the other way around.
7. Love how Jack Bauer's hands are literally bloody in the car with Pillar. You know that P-Meng was losing in shit, maybe literally, when Jack appeared in that back seat.
8. This scene with Dalia Hassan, President Taylor, and the pen is really driving home how far Allison Taylor has fallen in the abyss of evil, and you know what Angel cleans the abyss of filth, angel Bauer
9. I'm not sure why Chloe is talking about email the file to everyone in the government and the media. Just post that shit on the CTU twitter or the CTU facebook page with a hashtag "JUSTIN BIEBER TWILIGHT" and it will blow up quicker than that suicide bomber.
10. "You try to make a move on me, the slightest twitch, I will put a bullet in your brain," says Jack to Pilar. And then he follows it up with "I AM JUDGE AND JURY!" Classic shit right there
11. Meredith Reed being involved this late in the game is a great twist by the writers, a twist, that I didn't see coming.

12. Dalia Hassan vs Allison Taylor, one of the best scenes in 24 history.  I'm making the call right now. Acting, acting, and more acting! Necar Zadegan, the actress playing Dalia Hassan is on point and just when you thought it couldn't get crazier, Cherry Jones as Pres Taylor brings the acting wrath by threatening war!
13. Where are these buildings in New York City where you can just walk through marble hallways with a giant packpack and a pistol? No security cameras or nothing.
14. The word "Russian Bastards" should be used more in action movies and television shows involving spies. It's just so cool, almost as highly ranking as "these nazi bastards."
15. Arlo is one sly son of a bitch, picking up Jack's Bauer reflection in a vending machine selling Appolo bars? That's two finales in a row with vending machines playing key roles.
16. Jack getting on that video chat is a statement to the whole series. He's talking to the viewers, the dedicated folks who've tuned in for eight years, he's explaining his entire philosophy, of the show.

17. Tim Woods is the new Agent Pierce.
18. A fellow CTU Agent points out that the head of the UN, who by the way we haven't seen all season, looks a lot like Tyler Perry.
19. And another fellow CTU agent points out that Logan is always picking out ties, and then agent points out that the fact that Logan is always fixing his tie is a way of showing, not telling us that Logan is obsessed with his appearance. What a dream team of CTU agents I have working with me?
20. Chloe is the head of CTU, she should know better than to go off the grid in high heels and a pant suit.
21. Jack taking out Chloe was disturbing, there's history there, I didn't like it one bit.
22. Then again, I DID LIKE Jack smiling at the end of barrel with Logan's face at the end of it.
23. Honestly I forgot that this Russian President Yuri Suvarov has been featured in past seasons five and six. And man what a surprise that he played a slimy bastard on LOST too. Yes, believe it, he was  psychic Richard Malkin on LOST.
24. My fellow CTU Agents and I are in agreement that the scene where President Logan has nothing to say to the Russian President was actually pretty funny. "So brah, what the shit are we talking about here, you called me up here for nothing?"
25. Jack can't stand see someone put their hands on his real true love - Chloe.
26.  THE RETURN OF THE VAMPIRE BITE! Pillar had it coming.
27.  FPJ you've been through so much today, you've buried bodies in Marshes, engaged in fire fights in docks, and done other wild shit, but you can't stop two stooges from stopping your file transfer, weak FPJ, weak, go back to Wing Commander.
28. Damn, Logan is getting pretty Shakespearean with his description of Bauer "he will claw his way out of the very depths"
29. Jack's video message to President Taylor was a little too hippie for me, but I understand Jack's been through a lot and after 8 days he's developed a little liberal streak, not sure how the network is going to take this.
30. I never would have thought that one of the most tense moments of the season would have been the simple act of signing a treaty
31. The drone finally works! The Drone works! Arlo saved the day!
32. "I would do anything to take back the time" says President Taylor. Not sure if I would, I love every damn hour of this show. Even the bad ones were better than everything else*.
33. It's been real doing these points for you guys these past years, thanks for reading, I appreciate it. So until the movie.

Scramble and countdown to zero

Halloween Show Down: Vampires Vs Werewolves Vs Zombies

In the spirit of Halloween let's do a classic little mash-up, and I aint talking about any "Glee" mashup, I'm talking about a bone snapping flesh ripping monster Face Off. So here we go

Zombie- I'm only including the brain eeeaating beasts out of courtesy because let's be honest here folks, zombies even a zombie horde doesn't bring much to the table. Even if you give them that "28 Days Later" super speed, all they have is their intensity. If they can get taken down quick with simple headshot/lawn mower decapitation, I don't see how they can hang with Vampires and Werewolves.

Vampire- Ah, the Twilight terror. Blessed with strength, shape shifting (bats, wolves, it don't matter), and a thirst for sangre rojo, the vampire is quite a nemesis. In the evening, he can regulate Warren G style, but let's just be honest here, in the daytime, totally helpless. Forced to sleep in the box, dreaming of The Harker Sisters, and totally exposed.

Werewolf- Don't let the Taylor Lautnerization of these ferocious beasts fool you, they don't play around. And while they only come out during a full moon, when they are at the height of their powers they are not be taken lightly, which is a polite way of saying they are not to be fucked with.

The Verdict: Lil bit of an upset here, I gotta go with the Werewolf, but not for the reasons you might think. Let me break it down and drop a lil something on you right here. Werewolves are the only creatures that have full mental capacity during the day, so while Vampires are sleeping, Werewolves are scheming. And yeah they only turn when the moon is full, but it's as simple as not inviting vampires inside. Give it up Wolfie, you're the champ.

Arnold in the Predator Sequel

While Arnold's first responsibility is slaying the demonic beast known as the California budget crisis, he has not forgotten about another beast, this one an intergalactic bounty hunter. In rumors flying around the web this week, some people are saying that Arnold will return in Robert Rodriguez's new Predator film. This was original scoop at Moviehole.com

"“Robert’s camp has just reached out to Arnie’s [camp]”, we were informed. “But they haven’t had a response yet”.

While the rumor was recently completely debunked, it still was face melting and mind fryinginly cool. Now I'm still all nostalgic about "Predator" and how it is THE MOST MACHO FILM EVER MADE. Seriously, lines from the film include the classics "If it bleeds we can kill it" and "I aint got time to bleed."

So they got a blood thing going on, maybe Arnold will appear in the new Twilight flick. Either way, just a rumor, a mere side-step in the cinematic world regarding Arnold and the action movie pantheon got me all jacked up. I mean there's a reason why the crowd went wild when he showed in Terminator.......He's Arnold, the one and only.

Free Games :: Myspace Layouts

I saw Twilight, yeah, I saw it

I mean it's not like I'm bragging about when I'm watching 24, drinking beers, and playing Gears of War 2 with the fellas, but yeah, I saw the vampire chick-flick fantasy film. And I gotta say, it's an effective film for it's core audience.

The core audience in this case are the women in the audience who were losing their shit whenever "hair man" Robert Pattinson graced the screen.

But by far the best scene in the film is when the vampires go play baseball in a thunderstorm. You see they use the crack of thunder to hit the crack of the bat as they crank monster hits. Of course, their superior vision, strength, and speed make it so even garguantuan hits are merely doubles or singles. Basically it's what the MLB would have become if steroid use was encouraged and required.

I'm sure that somewhere in the great graveyard of movie villians, Dracula is watching this scene and thinking, damn, dude, I never got to play baseball. I coulda hadda shot. But, I shouldn't shit on the movie, the ladies loved it. Me, I'm sticking with "True Blood."

Friday Preview (Dogs, Vamps, and Drugs)

Dogs, vampires and superheroes, that is what we are working with this weekend at the multiplex. When you think about, that trio is almost guaranteed to deliver a hit. Throughout history, adorable dogs, blood sucking vampires, and buffed out superheroes typically deliver the goods, so why would this weekend be any different? Makes you think, when is the movie about a the vampire dog with superpowers coming out?

First up you have the new Disney flick "Bolt" starring the voices of John Travolta ( a little note here, people make fun of Travolta for being a scientologist, but the dude was in "Broken Arrow" and the 7th grade classic "Face/Off", so he's legit in my book) and Miley Cyrus. I'm not going to see this in theaters, but if I watch it with my little cousins at Thanksgiving, I won't be complaining.




And of course, you have the "Twilight", the teen vampire romance action spectacular. It stars "hair man" aka Robert Pattinson and is about a chick that falls in love with a vampire in the same town that Rambo is from ( I don't know if that is true, but the towns look the same). People are pumped about this movie, but when I say people, I mean girls who are dreaming of the day a dashing stranger who may or may not be a vampire sweep them away from their boring life. I had one of the books once and was going to read it, but my buddy's girlfriend snatched it from my possession. Tough break or a blessing in disguise?




And finally we have "Special", the new super hero starring Michael Rapaport as a guy who takes a test drug and may or may not have gained super powers from it. Rapaport is great character actor who has been in many great films including "Higher Learnings" and the TV show "Boston Public." The concept of people doing drugs and thinking they are super-heroes is not original. Damn, I know some people who have smoked weed before and thought they had x-ray vision (dude I can see my bones dude, I'm tweaking out).


The Verdict: Go see Bolt, it's Disney, it's a dog and doesn't involve vampires or drugs. It's good clean fun.